2019-05-03

The Hot-Spring–Episode

I decided to re-publish my old Tumblr captions on Blogger, alternating between old and new stuff. You can distinguish my old stuff from my new stuff by the additional (slightly pretentious) label “classic”. There are over four thousand of them (which should take over five years to publish), and this is the very, very first of them I ever wrote:

Ah, come on, don’t be a spoilsport, just because we went on a holiday together as a bunch of friends and we two made this stupid bet and you lost, and now you are my slave deprived of any rights for the rest of your life in a legally binding way, and because I have a mean streak in me, I will never ever again allow you to have another orgasm, that doesn’t mean you have to be so miffed about it, ruining everyone’s mood.
I know you had other plans with your life, like going to college or eventually losing your virginity, but you have to play with the cards fate deals you and accept the random and arbitrary blessings of Lady Fortune.
Come on, look at the bright side, from now on, I can do without this silly swimsuit, and you’ll get to see me naked all the time. Isn’t that great?
I know you had a crush on me for some time now. You may as well admit it, I actually find it quite flattering. Not that it matters anymore, since as my slave, you are obliged to worship and obey me and treat me like there is no other women in the universe for you.
Here, since I’ll permanently lock you up in an escape proof chastity cage, leaving only your hands and your tongue as your sex organs, I’ll show you what you’ll have to do from now on, until I’ll get a proper boyfriend.
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After the great Tumblr apocalypse, I decided to try out Blogger as a new home for my captions, but I found the experience rather frustrating...